Life is never that pleasant as always , same applies to LOVE . Seriously , I am willing to do anything , to lay my hands out. I am utterly exhausted. Do you really feel like that I didnt put in any effort to keep everything in the right position ? Am I really that rebellious for you ? I ponder almost everyday , for what could have be done to avoid any unnecessary arguements. I really have no idea why do we have to argue so constantly , for the most pettiest thing in the world. Is it my bad , or we were never meant to be together ? I am afraid of losing you , is because I love you. Can't you feel it ? Can't you tell from how I treated you ? Why do you have to doubt my love for you ? What you did was no different from stabbing knives into my heart. Every single word uttered from your mouth stays forever in my heart , so pls mind your words. It hurts me without you knowing.
You knew I was this way when you made your decision to step in my world , but why now you're asking for a change ? It's not that I am not willing to change for you , but I just want to be who I really am. If you insisted me to change for you , I'll. But to be honest , it will never be me anymore. I'll be the one you want , but not the one you loved before. Perhaps , someone you wished to love more. If you want me to choose between myself and you , you're forever my choice , because I exist because of your existance. If I were to lose you , can I still be the one I wanted to be all along ?
I am lost with no direction and I cant find the right path back to reality whenever I argue with you. I wished I can stay in my very own dreamland where there is no arguements and unhappiness, a place where there is only blissfulness. I only want to see smile and laughter in you . I can hardly breathe , hardly concentrate in doing certain things , as my mind is filled with thoughts of you. I have no confident found in myself , I am afraid of failing everything , I feel very insecure.
Can I still count on you ?
No comments:
Post a Comment